The Elder Responds:

for Sammy: God, where do I even begin...?

How about every time you let (encouraged!) your rug-rats to pester me?

How about when you dumped Cooksey (and/or his "wife")(Tanya?) on me every chance you got?

How about the time you divorced your first wife and unleashed her on an unsuspecting world?

How about every time you fabricate stories that make me appear to be more stupid than I would otherwise appear (I don't need any help with that. I have stupid covered, thank you!)?

How about every time I spent way too much money to make sure YOU had a good time, and then you turned right around and made sure Carrie knew to the penny how much I had spent (over-spent)(I NEVER spend money on just myself)?

And how about that Leah chic (Michelle's brother's "thang"?)? Wasn't she from Arkansas? And why did she always have to ride with me? Come to think of it, I think there might have been some other female (from down the road?) that was loosely associated with your clan that was a little too nice for my good...